Sadness is my friend, sadness is my foe.
Sometimes I can sit with it and let it be. Other times it bubbles to the surface and boils over, leaving a mess in its wake. And sometimes I let myself just be consumed by it;
I submit to it.
Feelings are just that, feelings.
It’s also because of them, that we do the things we do.
It’s because of our feelings, our desires for one another,
that we hope to execute shared dreams;
that we invest and feed each other’s souls.
What do we do when it all seems to be in jeopardy?
When you wonder if it was all an illusion?
You lied to me; I lied to myself.
Perhaps it is me.
I’m my own worst enemy.
So much time spent trying to be strong, when maybe we’re afraid. Or unsure. Or because we fear being vulnerable.
But what if being strong also means being receptive? Understanding that emotions are complex and sometimes messy. That it takes strength to sort through these feelings and understand them better. As humans, we have a penchant for making things harder than they need to be. Always so driven by action. Maybe strength means knowing when to give yourself a break.
We all need a support system. Sometimes we shut down and need to be alone;
sometimes we need the support of our loved ones.
Even if we don’t want to ask.
The ones who care about our well being,
our mental states.
Those who may not always agree with what we do,
but are there to listen to the troubles that keep us up at night.
Even if they give you advice that you don’t take, they’re still there for you; that’s what friends do.
They’re there for the good and the bad;
even if you end up making poor decisions,
they will be there because they love you.
They respect that your life is yours to live,
they understand their own shortcomings
and stay around to see you make it to the other side,
to help congratulate you when you overcome it all.
And you’re ever so thankful that they didn’t give up on you.
I have to stay motivated, keep myself focused and remember to be kind to myself, because it’s hard. I’m no longer in my twenties and I think life is finally starting to break me down a little bit. Even though I try not to let it. I have to believe that I can manifest greatness in my life, but I have to be an active participant; I can’t just wait for it to happen.
Thank you for being you, for unknowingly being a muse, for cracking through my fortress.
Thank you for believing in me, for encouraging me to be more active about things I was passive about. I’m still a work in progress, sometimes I fall off, but I think about what you’d say if you saw me slacking.